I have no knowledge of how many have read these blogs or if anyone has. If there are some who have, then their response will be similar to uptight, upright scholastically trained theologians. I have written to more than a few of these and their consensus seems to be I am deluded. One or two have majestically spouted Luther’s scriptural accusation against the Church “even the Devil can appear as an Angel of Light” which he quoted in his malicious haste to destroy the grace in the
Why then do I write? I hope not boastfully, a vice many claim for me or accuse me of as they follow in Luther’s footsteps of denial by personally denying that Grace might exist in me. They are easily as malicious as he is. I once found in an introduction written by Fr George Maloney SJ., in “The Discourses of Symeon the New Theologian” (949-1022) a description that is very apt for the Church today. He shows that St Bernard who was writing, at the same time as Symeon, was locked in a strenuous battle with Peter Abelard and other philosophers. The Abelards were separating Mystical Theology from speculative theology. Abelard won and scholasticism became the Queen of all sciences.
What then is my point? I fear we are suffering the same events today between the two so very different elements of theology. I mean the uptight head-trip scholastic theology of the Hierarchy today and the true mystical theology of Symeon and the Benedictine Fr Louismet Sauvignon. I hope that I have not lost any reader so far but I warn you worse is yet to come. In the Latin Church today a renewal has come, attempting to bring us back to the simple, beautiful illumination of the Holy Spirit. I mean the bright light of which St Symeon wrote. Outside the Church, and there are many inside, we can find the Pentecostals who though on the right trail are far removed from the Light of God. Unfortunately, many priests today are so badly formed they cannot give good guidance or let alone be a spiritual guide, even stand before the mistaken ones and say you are wrong. Even St Faustina admits to this in her diary. She certainly scoffed at the behavior of many priests who tried foolishly to test her in the confessional and rightly so.
The basic advice from which we should start is, follow the good Church teachings that tell us we should be purified thoroughly before we embark on this spiritual journal. Wait; is some asking how this purification takes place? I do not think many will because they already claim holiness through low gifts for which Christ tells them, “Away with you, you cursed ones”. Knowing this let me tell you the way to the Light as the Catholic and
Now it is time for my confession. Why do I write of my personal interior life? Answer me this, “Do you really think that what is happening to me is mine and mine alone?” Foolish men what happens to me is for you all. The fervent practicing catholic, following the Church’s instructions, repenting and doing penances accepting the Eucharist in a state of grace will slip deeper and deeper into what we call the abyss of God’s Love. This catholic is a true mystic. God guaranteed it through His Son, His Promised Word. I wish and hope that by now you are no longer calling me boastful and presumptuous because of my faith. A faith that believes that nothing I have is mine and that what happens to me is for you all. It is for you to discover the way. I can only describe mine and plead you will try it too. I hope that your attitude towards me stops short of accusing me of exhibitionism. May God not allow it, that is for me to be an exhibitionist. I write being mindful of God’s gifts which He has bestowed upon me from my conception until now and write in gratitude and thanksgiving to make you aware of the talents he wants us to use and not to bury or waste. Ask yourselves deep in your interior life where God wants to dwell, providing we clean up His temple from the product that comes from the nether end of the bull, spread like manure in our mind by our jealous enemy satan.
To feel the burning presence of God as one prays, the loss when he does not show His grace, the loneliness and despair when prayers are constantly interrupted, the delight when one approaches and receives the Eucharist are all-magnificent. God will let you know He is there and it is not a human feeling, it is not sensuous to the brutish extreme that many claim today. I can say peace is not the claimed feeling of today’s holy ones nothing can be further from the truth. The agitation at the His loss becomes David’s prayer, “ Turn not your face from me, take not your Holy Spirit from me” a confession from the truth one’s soul knows from her experience and the resulting consuming terror that one has sinned is not peace. Peace is the feeling one gets when God’s test is finished and He calls you up into the next level of Heaven. Why does He do this, I find for two reasons One we cannot last the pace set by His Love. We would probably burn up if not out and two to question our faith in His ways, to see if we can stay the course. Paul could only claim the third heaven early on in his evangelistic life and he lamented often of the thorns that separated him from Jesus. There is a strong difference in claimed peace and the real presence of Christ in you. As for the Pentecostals, they are the conceited prideful inheritors of the mystery religions that agitated Paul so much. It can only be noted that they lack the Spiritual Guides that will open the eye of the needle for them, before it is too late