All Conversations in My Heart
Monday, September 21, 2009
  The Magnificence, the Magnitude, and Might of God.

I found these thoughts hard to set out for anyone to read. It is not that I am claiming any advantage over any of you. My advantages are the same as yours but taking them as they are given is harsh problem, the world never believes. The time spent to obtain them is a harsh effort. How often have I prayed for perseverance, fortitude, patience and prudence and yet we can find how we can claim those virtues in the light of scriptures.


From reading criticisms and commentaries on so called private revelations, called private because it then becomes easier to forbid them without using one's conscience, I am appalled by the lack of any sense of the immensity of God by many of these writers and their commentaries on the spiritual life of others without the proper examination and approval of the Pope. It is my hope that what seems to be, as approaching, skirting the bounds of Blasphemy of the Holy Spirit is not included in these writings and denials. of which you read above. Especially I think when I see some of the reasons advanced for the complete dismissal of what may just be the Work of the Holy Spirit. Rarely do I see in these condemnations any examination or mention of the Spiritual Life of those who are examined. It must be said that from personal experience I claim that two things screw up the Holy Spirit on these occasions. The pride of the followers whose motto may just as well be, “I have made up my mind. Do not bother me with facts”. The pride of the messengers as their ego is manipulated by the adulation given unrestrictedly by the hangers on found in their egotistical behavior who say, by their actions “I know more than the Church”. We know John Paul 2 wrote the Bishops have to examine them and report upon these claims of spirituality to see if they are false. The book, “Newman’s essays on Miracles” should be read by any catholic and it is or can be seen as a reason why so many are able to say the miracles in scriptures are more or less natural phenomena. So many today echo that viewpoint when it comes to any spiritual action and the envy is shocking.

Can we know the absolute grandeur and magnificence of God? Yes of course we can if God’s wisdom allows us. Unfortunately, we all know that so many never reach that point in prayer, known as Divine Contemplation. The point where in the extra ordinary silence of God teaches us of Himself to the level that the indwelling grace we have earned by a spiritual use of a pick and shovel can admit us know in our hearts the sheer immensity of His Glory. It is plain for anyone who looks we do not reach that level of true charity in our life. The charity that drives us to true and perfect humility, to realize what we are and what the Fatherhood of God really and truly means to us and what it is for us in our life. A life so spotted by sin. Outside of Mary our Mother there is probably in reality, a very real reality, there is only St Francis of Assisi, who overcame himself by self denial and discipline. A revelation given to a Franciscan notes St Francis occupies Lucifer’s throne and that is why he is called the seraphic father by Franciscans

We like Sampson of the old law, we rise and fall to rise again through penance and repentance. Look at his story, which as it is in scriptures we are bound to accept. Sampson was a Nazirite. He vowed to grow his hair and never cut it. He did not use alcohol, fat meats and remained, or at least he was supposed, a virgin from birth. He surrendered to temptation and only got His strength back when purified spiritually through the most terrible of penances. He was blinded by his enemies. He was imprisoned and underwent the grief of repentance. God forgave Sampson as He always will when we are sincere in what we practice. What is this sincerity that we must practice? We must be truly and deeply sorry and absolutely give up sinning. It is so very easy for us to promise, but so hard for anyone in this world to do. We must use the proper virtues and then we can and we will earn forgiveness.

I have gone away from what I started to write on how we never reach that grace that helps us to contemplate the magnificence of the Father’s immensity. I use such poor words to speak or write trying to describe Him. Like Sampson I keep falling but struggle through forming the Cross again and again in my mind, confessing my sins in the confessional and the sacramental rite of the Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church.

How many times do I return to the rite and say I promised not to but, I went out and did it again without thinking. I would say I am no different than any of you. I reach high above me, so high above me and our Father leans down from such a lofty height and lifts me into His arms and at times gives me a kiss and I resolve and ask that I am preserved from the temptations, the occasions, the misfortunes and dreadfulness of sin, and my prayer life begins again. Have I made myself clear if not try this. Teresa Higginson, St Faustina at roughly the same period in time knew directly from God of the Ocean of His Mercy, the depth less ocean of His Love. Teresa compares us as a teardrop in that ocean. Well I comprehend it this way, it would have to be so many oceans of the magnitude in the ratio of one of our tears in the first ocean to emphasize the difference between us and God and then even then the ratio would not be anywhere near accurate. And we claim from His promises we are His Children. I know but it is so hard to accept because of the paucity of my intelligence how God so loves us with all that magnificence. It seems He cannot not stop Himself from kneeling before us to hug us and kiss us. St Bernard wrote about the kiss obviously he experienced it.

I once and on two subsequent occasions saw a magnificent flame. I did not see as a fire with width and height but only as a flame that went up and up, well beyond my vision, The flame and flames inside sang and sang, they hummed with great beauty. I watched as sparks flew off and some returned brighter, some less so, some were flickering but the majority were out and bounced off the flame into a large dark abyss at the foot of the Light. Sparks were souls I would think. We should not in our conceit neither deny God does love us in a way that we can only understand in a different human manner, than His, It is unfortunate we do not completely understand His Love. Remember he said, “Suffer little Children come unto me”. Should it be written, “Little children who suffer come to me and I will love you”.

When I wrote and sent the Flames episode to a Bishop, whom I was told by a priest who said, "This Bishop could help me". I received an answer, “I do not know what you are writing about. It does not make sense”.

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