All Conversations in My Heart
Friday, July 24, 2009
  A period of Grace 3
As I think back over those times I find so precious and alarming, I find that I scorn parts of the Church's instructions on Private revelations and the lack of intelligence on the part of the local ordinaries in dealing with the supernatural. It would be better if the Hierarchs, so out of touch with the supernatural and catholic mystical spirituality, would use their intelligence and church actions to make a proper statement. Perhaps they should say this. Not all spiritual and supernatural gives the grace that sanctifies. Many of these events are there for the spiritual good of the faithful and can lead them to that state of grace that sanctifies for those who examine and then do their best to follow the life that Christ expects through His example. I am not holy every time I get there or nearly do so, I turn around and sin that is I defy God's will for me. Throw it back in His face I mean. This defiance is dreadful in the extreme for any catholic. We are not even tepid . At least that will get you into purgatory where you and I will likely undergo the payment of many debts. This is called satisfaction. All I can say I do try to behave in the example seen and read in the word and life of Christ.

For the sign seekers who can sit and sigh over what they read and for the self acclaimed professors of faith let me tell you bluntly what have learned from these occasions. First they tell me how spiritually jealous and dismissive are people of our religion. I scorn this attitude. I learnt that all these graces are meaningless if we do not use the Sacramental Life of the Church. I was able to see first hand the benefits of a good confession and the foolishness of scruples in the confessional. I mean the inability to accept that a true confession acted out with sincerity completely, once penance is done, causes God to never remember our confessed sin. Through scruples we are constantly reminding God of our sin. It is I think like a dog returning to his own vomit. I saw in myself the dreadfulness of making and breaking so easily the firm purpose of amendment that is our part of the Sacrament. I was able to watch as gifts of God which are reasonable and given for a reason die down in me and others. I learnt how hard it is for Mary to overcome what Heaven considers, because of deliberate sins committed by a lack of fortitude, the biblical act of fornication with what might make of us to become a kindred spirit to a sinful creature, whose hate is considerable. I learnt and experienced this hatred first and how to fight it. I was given for the slightest of time how hell feels.

So back to beyond the horizon of my life to that time when for four of us, God lowered it, for us to see over it and truly obey His second great commandment. Love others as I have loved you.

Early One February dawn I was told to look up. I tried but could not wake up sufficiently (probably a lack of grace on my part). Again I was told, with the same result. The third time and I managed and saw an old fashioned Movie Screen. It was like the Movitone or RKO news we used to see in cinemas. Transparent film was projected onto the screen complete with what I knew to be scratches in the acetate base. There were silhouettes of people at the bottom of the screen. shadows perhaps better describe them. One again I was told look and the date March 17 appeared on the screen. Then the screen vanished.

March 17th came, I went to the morning mass and nothing. I went into the Blessed Sacrament Chapel and prayed, nothing. We got together at 6 pm and said the Angelus and the Rosary. Nothing unusual except that 'L' was not present. We finished our prayers and went to visit her. Boy she was sick, seemed to be very sick with the Flu. "Let me pray over you ?" and I did. As I prayed she became redder and redder and perspiration poured off her. After a while I had nothing more to ask and "L" was fine. We had a coffee and all left. At three in the morning the phone rang and "L" said, "I am to tell you, it is a healing". The next day I asked , "What was this phone call all about". She had been awakened by a man all in white who said to her, "It is a healing ,tell Michael". So she started to pray the St Michael Chaplet. "No ! No! tell Michael", so she started the St Michael Prayer. "No! No! phone Michael", and so she phoned me. Much later she told me that up to that day she was attacked by Lupus.

Work it out for yourselves 4 witnesses to the healing and two witnesses to the phone call and two witnesses to the hearing the message.
 
Thursday, July 23, 2009
  Continuation of Grace

The four of us started to pray together and spending time as friend’s . I do not think you could find four more disparate creatures.y. We all had one thing in common our histories we were extremely sinful and I would not hesitate to say we between us had broken all of the seven deadly sins. I mean that before you all jump to a conclusion as catholics do, in gossip and thought, we never committed all the sins each, just the seven between us.

This gossip and thought often does and in this case was a searing definite proof of Christ’s words, very few see any good in local prophets. Eventually killed to be a culmination of something that was to have been good for so many., and I write without fear of the dismissal that will follow, so good for the Church. Why did we or were we called together to pray. Many locally were not interested in this question or of asking it of themselves. Why do Catholics fear to ask and to study circumstances that arise spiritually? Why is it always the loud mouthed in parishes that have, with the most envious attitudes at competition, look upon fellow parishioners with disdain and then quite literally blaspheme the work of the Holy Spirit? Ihey are without a shadow of doubt spiritually envious re-committing Eves sin in essence they claim they know more than God and this is normal in the Church today. I they dismiss and encourage their followers to do likewise by denying I mean the complete works that prayer gives rise to in a soul and can be seen if one asks Him for help in comprehending all the circumstances that His work demonstrates. The signs He really scatters amongst us rather like a Gardener sowing seeds, harrowing the land to make it sprout the goodness that feeds us; in this case spiritually. He casts, as the saying goes, bread upon the troubled spiritual waters of our lives. Why not, because of our thoughts, so full of conceit about our state. I pose this question would not a truly providential God, such as ours, constantly remind us of His Presence around us and especially for those who through a proper union in the sacraments have in Him them?

So why were the four of us picked? Did we, in some way, volunteer through prayers and humble supplication? For myself I could never stand others in pain, whether it was through bullying by mental abuse; too infirm to do anything for themselves, sick or in pain. Therefore, I prayed to be able to help in anyway. I watched in my parish church as an altar boy as a woman cried as she received Holy Communion and asked to do the same. It started in a small way at the sixth station of the cross as I cried with Veronica as she dried the spit and blood off Christ’s face. I knew I should be as brave as she was then and face the howling mob to be His friend. For one of the others she offered to take upon herself Christ’s suffering for others if He healed her of hers. For another her loneliness was such she was constantly in prayer for others and she asked for it to be eased, that is her loneliness. She prayed for a little person she loved who needed help constantly and she is still able to hold this child close to her heart. She is very much in demand for companionship by others. I do not think the realization of the answer has occurred to her. The last was tormented by her past life the state of her husband and her children, the state of the Church and the priesthood, which even as a little girl when she asked why so many profess Catholicism and act the opposite. She grew disenchanted as a young girl at the answers given by priests who passed off her simple question, “Why do they?”

As I will tell you every one of our prayers were answered in a way that was apropos. Our prayers were blessed and we were given the opportunity to do something about it. I was shown how to practice fortitude in the face of what I saw as a howling mob all catholic by the way. One suffered the same pains as the ones we prayed over, even pains for injuries they did not know they had. One’s loneliness vanished and she lost her fear for the time being of dogs, people, and open spaces.

All sorts of people asked for prayers and healings of all sorts took place.

I do not write this in a whiny, querulous frame of mind, neither as a prayer for justice. I know God takes care of all things in His Time and patience is the answer. At what am I angry with those who allow temptation and then pride to dismiss God’s work? All of the healings our prayers obtained are still valid. The grace of God upholds them I also know that some of the cures we thought we wanted were not what God intended and from conversations after I could see why. In some cases, it was a preparation for one or two to enter, to go through the gateway into eternal life. It was chance to change. Again, I remind you of the Prayer I received a little later. The hero of Fatima prayer that gave those who heard it a chance to know of the view of God upon their souls at the moment in time so awful and frightening that on most occasions He had nothing to give them.

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Wednesday, July 22, 2009
  Returning to Past Relationships

Before I begin let allow me to quote this man

Britain’s Chief Rabbi Lord Jonathon Sacks wrote

“But,” Sacks writes, “note this: the things we care about are vast, distant, global, remote.” When it comes to matters closer to us such as trust or simple truth telling, Sacks says we have more or less abandoned notions of right and wrong. Instead, the West has embraced a morality in which what ultimately matters, ethically speaking, is whether we choose something.

Choice has become its own justification and the only sin is to question anyone’s moral choices. To do so is to be “intolerant” or “judgmental.” Who are you to question my choice to lie on my mortgage-application or my choice to betray my wife?

Anything written that follows is what I witnessed heard and observed. It may be I judged but not wrongly, perhaps by some standards as Lord Sacks wrote in the Daily Telegraph, it is. But I did not condemn and I am amazed that all those who say Lord! Lord! Will probably be treated as Matthew warned. I do sincerely hope then have a metanoia.

There are other occasions events that took place over time that sprang from my prayer relationship with Lorna Keras and starting the Angelus and Rosary at St Joseph’s in Mission. Apart from the spiteful anger of the Parish Priest at me and the 6 pm prayer meeting we frequented 5 days a week. Never once showing up to lead us but always peeping through a small window to watch us a real peeper he was. The only time he came into the same room was to ask us to pray for a parishioner who was killed in a dreadful car accident earlier that day. Funnily enough for want of a better expression as we prayed one woman watched her ascend into heaven. This I would never doubt because of the great charitable works this woman did for any priest.

Just after the group started, Mary’s presence was noted by the woman present who exclaimed astonishment over the most beautiful perfume one of them was wearing. It was late fall and the gardener had removed all the plants outside. It was the first of many occasions when the scent of every flower ever blooming made itself apparent. Just as my wife and I had a simultaneous interior, urge to start the Rosary in the Church another woman and I had the urge to start a smaller group. We talked about it and the other three whose presence was required by again an interior thought met at our home, a very lonely place far from any distractions. As we talked, I asked “L” what she could see in the trees across from our big picture window. She saw, as I did, the face of Christ patterned by the leaves. This prayer relationship was the start of a religious experience, which did not blossom, as it should have. It was set aside by spiritual envy, a blasphemy of the Holy Spirit by local small "c" catholics who would not could not, even with all the proof Jesus provided, accept it . They were Holy and in their eyes two of us in this group one was an intemperate rogue and the other a half wit. By their often expressed standards. The same sinfulness also reached out to us from someone who knew better Lorna through her group. No one could be as holy as Lorna was, which is written in the stone minds of her group. They made this a comparison with at least one priest, whom they did not impress. I took three priests there. This account is written in a previous blog. A fact I reported to the Vicar General at that time. One of them strongly insisted on two occasions what I was and my information did not come from God. Another later member of Lorna’s cult told a lonely defenseless man, a Ron Bouchard, who had a serious medical problem that he sometimes ffor which he often forgot to take his medicine. Ron has since died a lonely death. This follower would not pray with Ron if he persisted on praying with me. Ron even arranged to pray with us both at the Grotto in Mission. We did and I asked if I could say my prayer over him that begins, “I am the Hero of Fatima”. He became so apprehensive, turned, and ran. Later he came back at around the end of the second decade. He habitually wore at least that was what I noticed two huge silver ornaments (in his case) a Tau and a Cross-they were big enough to clink as he walked (ran). He came back brandishing and waving them in my face. Later I asked what caused him to run. His answer was he felt such a tremendous power hit him. I told him of a problem which incident I am sure he understood caused a blasphemy to occur. I told him how Mary of Salette had stamped her foot and said, “They will not pick and choose between my Prophets. “L” saw this and heard the exclamation. This expert on holiness said, “Mary might cry, Mary might Laugh but she would never stamp her foot”. I reminded him of Genesis. All he could say you have a hard road ahead and left.

More next time on this “period in time” and its ending. For those who locally think I am weird, there is likely to come a time soon when you will have to explain that to a Power far bigger than anything on Earth. I recommend stand before the Cross and pray. Say, “My God, My God how have I offended Thee in what way have I deserted Thee?” So many as Mary says, “We would like to talk to and so many will not listen”.

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