Read at your own risk and consider all things carefully
Here we go again another foray into the interior of my soul. Today as I was praying the Rosary for the Church, for My family and for my intellect to be guarded, the realization hit me that old thoughts were returning and that I was examining events of some years ago, and hearing a name, one of many names given to me By Heaven being repeated. Now it also penetrated very deeply into my mind I was to publish one or more of these episodes. I asked with my prayer for confirmation as I was a little worried at what the consequences may, would be for my life in the local church, in the local diocese. Of course silly priests have the idea today if we are agitated by a thought, then it is not of God. They are quite happy to leave it there, with that rationalizing thought. “Ah me!” I say. I do get a feeling of trepidation and who would n’t. Imagine if you can if you were in my shoes, could you any of you do this and know it would hold you up to ridicule by your brothers and sisters in Christ. I also judge myself and ask would it make me a star in the soap opera that is the local parish and I might add the local chancery office.
I fear with good reasons and solid examples of the sort of harassment and disbelief I have received Before. many Priests and Catholics will not believe, after all it has not happened to them, their egos and holiness being the yardstick by which they judge what they do want to believe. It is the truth and if I am to release what might be construed as memoirs at least those of you who know me admit you have never heard me lie. In fact many priests rather than attract the ire of their Bishop would rather I went away or just disappeared, quoting the Church they will say it is not necessary for salvation. I ask it this way. I know it is not necessary for mine but what about the others who act so uncharitably? I ask are any private revelations ever needed for salvation. Consider it well before you answer. I ask any of you locally, “have any of you ever heard me lie to make it easy for me and thence have you as friends or confidants?” Even priests who have heard my confession cannot dare to have the temerity to suggest I have lied to them. I do know what sin is I think and if I am going through a prompting of the Holy Ghost, then I must consider He has His reasons and perhaps as it is usual with catholics, you know His thoughts better than I so I hope with the firmest faith this is some kind of discourse by Him on the inept pastoral and the uncharitable ways of so many in the Church. On the following critique of one priest or many remember I was there and so many of you were not, so it is my memory and snarling character against the word of whoever else was involved. Therefore check your knowledge of the behavior of the others involved. Let me remind those who may take the time to read that we have entered into the end times, when the separation of the sheep and the goats has started. Look at the Church and consider sensibly the separations and vicious attacks on the Church, Priesthood and Religious. Why do you think it is happening? Internal evangelization of the Church must really begin and I might say with God’s vengeance now so we can all change. Why you ask? Well despite or in spite of the holy ones who are to be caught up some personal opinion of a great rapture as a reward for their holiness. Do you not or one moment think of what is approaching, Judgment Time so near from the God who will then hold us in one palm and the weight of our sins in the other. I personally not want to have His fingers close over me. I have not heard the Church who should and the priests who must preach this on this matter of false raptures. They, the rapturees, deny scriptures with their colossal pride. Look at the Flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, all whether they are innocent and guilty will have to pay or suffer, the Good and the Bad. Those who contributed, those who ignored and said nothing, we are all equally involved. We should and must know the consequences yet so many are in a state of fugue on the matter. God forbid we all are.
Hear again is the prayer I use, to confirm the deep interior thoughts as I pray.
I Michael, sealed in the Holy Spirit, baptized and anointed in the Most Precious Blood of My Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, with Mary my loving Mother tempering my words I ask God the beloved Father and Divine Companion of my heart and soul in the Name of Jesus His Son, to command whoever spoke to me about my spiritual (here I mention the thought) to identify himself.
This time, as usual, reciting the prayer over this blog, I got an answer and a statement of whom He was and so without hesitation here it is. The answer is found in scriptures and confirms his Status in the Trinity.
First of all let me nail myself in the foot again, knowing the outcry and condemnation that will follow. I suggest you read 1 Corinthians Chapter 4 verses 1 to 5 inclusive. I would also suggest you read a good commentary. I use the Navarre Bible Commentaries recommended to me by Fr William Most.
I prayed with some women as I wanted a spiritual guide. Now I urge you to remember I have been a Catholic since 1937 and have been fortunate to be well educated by a good parish priest, gentle and superlative Nuns, and some very good lay teachers. I know the Church from reading of Her, of Her Saints and Sinners. The spiritual guide demanded by today’s nutters in the Church is some kind of spiritually politically correct person that suits the ego of those who choose to use him or her that is someone suitable to her or his own personal advantages. That is they choose their own guide and that is a dreadful error as I will describe to you in an open minded way. The spiritual guide for us is not actually a spiritual guide under these rules, but is the confessor and parish priest appointed by the Local Ordinary to confess our sins and offer our sacrifice. This cannot be dodged or put aside or you will go to hell in a runaway hand cart, through your own pride. When the priest of his own volition can see he is treading on holy ground in which conceivably he has very little experience, he takes you one way or another to the Bishop. This pastoral expert, usually inept in today’s hierarchy, finds you a spiritual guide. Usually some one who has the expertise, knowledge and intellect to be a true pastor of your soul? I know this will occur, usually a great love and trust will develop between priest and penitent. This I can assure you. Why have I written this, unless it will give you food for thought? Pray that your intellect is guided by a good shepherd along the paths of righteousness.
I applied to the local parish priest for help with my interior life and I made for myself the implacable enmity of a coward and bully. He truly was a bully and as a priest described him later in a homily at the morning mass, “He was a wild man”. I went to this priest for nearly two years for confession, twice he ran out of the confession from me. He told me to find another parish more suited to my Catholicism. He told me to go back and sit in the pews and behave as I should. He made every president of the CWL cry except one. He was very careful with her. He, when that woman was elected, when he heard of the election, in a fit of temper hit the woman who was the messenger on the back of the head. The woman collapsed due to a previous stay in the hospital after a car accident. Years later he phoned my wife and told her how brave she was especially with my illness.
I visited the local sex crimes prison no one else from the Church did, except one man, I could understand why he stopped when I started, and some of their stories were either sickening or gut wrenching. There were dreadful men amongst them. I asked the parish priest to come with me to hear confessions. I had to threaten him with getting a priest from another parish and with the Archbishop. He told me that as on Sundays since I could take one to mass he did not want to see any of their smiling faces in the front row with me. Some should never have been in prison but it was and still is fashionable to penalize the small beyond the scope of the crime especially with sex crimes. I would I have allowed none of them, that I would have taken, near any child. I asked to start a rosary at six every evening he fought that bitterly and tried so hard to stop me until I reasoned with him this way. Lock the doors Father and you can explain both the bishop and the RCMP, why I had to kick in a window to come into my church to pray with some of the community. Better still there is the ‘phone, call the bishop and we will go right downtown now and speak to him.
I kneel for Holy Communion, always have and always will, the enchanted sisterhood in the Parish went to him and demanded that he stop me. Well he did try but I reminded him that the Church allowed it and myself with the same violence these women tried to do to my faith, made him announce at mass the next day he could not stop me. I made him aware if he did not, I would stand up and denounce him to the congregation. He told them. The same women when we started to say the Divine Mercy after morning mass tried their level best to stop us by standing up in the pews and talking loudly over us as we prayed. My voice has a loud timbre (big mouth) at times and it was easy to drive these mischievous imps away. It was a small chapel at the back of the main altar I lowered my voice a tone or so and spoke from the diaphragm and the echoing sent them packing. Then one evening at a meeting over the liturgy I asked the same group who were present if they would not mind going out into the vestibule to chatter and prattle after morning mass. Here are the statements by the leaders of the enchanted sisterhood. First a woman a real schismatic mover and shaker spoke up, “I do not come to mass often in the mornings (just about never from my attendance) and I come to socialize???? I speak to my friends and I can, because this is a house of man”. The VICE chair of the sisterhood lept up and said, “I agree it is a house of man” I said my piece, “K! I have been coming to this church for some while. I have always heard drivel coming from you but this is the worse so far”. The priest dear man said, “I agree with them Michael, and if you do not be quiet I shall ask you to leave”. My thoughts were somewhat different.
Let me digress a moment to write at no time did or has anyone asked me for my side of the story about any of the incidents that have happened, Not one. I would say, mostly from the look of scorn at any actions of mine, any sign of reverence, any token of adoration I find the eagerness to which catholics in either parishes or events have rushed to denigrate me is very enervating since Christ made it well known in scriptures, “They scorned Me. Do you not know they will scorn you?” Christ never lied and I cannot believe he is about to start any time soon.